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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 5/31/2006 2:10:40 PM
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| this is always a touchy topic and no matter what you do someone will be miffed - unless you allow a free-for-all in who brings who and watch your guest no's explode out of control. you simply cannot invite absolutely everyone. we had the same thing - who'd dks do you invite and who's do you not. and keeping in mind for us we have to keep our no.s down otherwise we'll be spending the rest of our lives (including retirement) trying to dig our way out of wedding debt and probably have to sell our house, car, hair, organs, and first born child to make ends meet. we decided - the only family we are not close to (as in seeing/talking to all the time) that will be invited will be aunts/uncles - immediate siblings of our parents. as for dks, only those we actually see and that belong to immediate family members (siblings) of ourselves. if an out of town guest cannot come without bringing their dks then we will accomodate them - but that would only be possibly 3 guests including fh's brother, only one of which is likely to come (and thats not the brother). for us its not so much about whether or not a wedding is appropriate for dks, its the huge cost involved in a wedding and having to keep our numbers under control and the fact that for every dk someone brings thats another friend or family member we would have liked to be able to invite and share our day with but cannot. i'd rather share my day with people i know and care about than a couple dozen dks i don't know and never see.
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Today @ 8:44:20 AM
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I'm waiting for the phone calls about how we should invite someone's child because they are mature enough... blah.. too bad.. I can't afford them.. and don't really want them there... (no offence to those having kids)
Jules 
Sparkules to make an appearance June 18.09
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 3/31/2008 8:47:11 AM
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| I really liked snowybird's idea. If you really can't come up with a cut off age, get the older kids to babysit! It will cost you a little more to have those children there but at least it will be fair to everyone and nobody can get upset for picking favourites. Personally, we're not having any children at the wedding (unless they are still breastfeeding), not even having a ring boy or flower girl just so we don't run into the siblings problem 
Cheers, Julia!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 12/20/2006 10:46:17 PM
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| It's interesting to see how everyone is handling this topic. Our wedding will not have any children invited. We have the cut off age as 18, and this does make some "children" invited while younger ones aren't, but as the other ladies have said, I think you need a definite cut off age and stick to it. However, most of our guests are from out of town, so we have booked another room in the hotel that we are calling the "hospitality suite". This is where the children can be during the ceremony and reception. All of our invites are the same, but to those with kids, we added an extra handwritten note, explaining the hospitality suite and if they do plan on bringing their children, then to please let us know on the rsvp so we can make the appropriate arrangments. Hope that helps!
Officially a Golf Widow - August 26, 2006
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Group: Forum Members
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| It should be kids or no-kids. Set an age, ie: min. 15 yrs. old and stick to it. Exceptions are what tick people off. Ie: your cousin "Sue" who is 13 can't come, but you allow cousin "John" to come, and he's 10. It does not matter about maturity because in the eyes of parents, their children are # 1, regardless of whether or not they are actually little hellions. I absolutely did not want children (under 16 yrs of age) at our wedding......we lucked out as there was no one in our family younger than 16! We picked the age 16 because they could govern themselves accordingly or leave on their own without disrupting others.
Married September 10, 2005 Expecting our lil' Monkey - February 5, 2009 Before you were conceived, you were wanted. Before you are born, you are loved.
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 5/26/2006 10:40:50 AM
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| I've had the same dilema...Kids or no kids? I've talked to my FH's mom about it and it made it even worse. Thing is I have a very small family. I'm the baby of all my cousins. I'm only 21 and they are all in late late twentys or thirties and they all have kids. I was thinking that we could just invite first cousins then...because my FH's first cousins are all older..like 12 and up which is fine. Then his mom say "but Kyle's(my FH) cousins kids live just down the road from the family farm and it would be rude not to invite them" they are like 7 and 9 and I thought well that won't work because if you invite some you have to invite all. My parents just tell me its my wedding and whoever I want there is who I should invite. Honestly I don't enjoy kids very much and really don't think they should be at a wedding. They fidget and talk during ceremonies and they should never be at a reception where there is drinking. I may sound a little harsh I don't mean to offend. its just that I know that my cousins children and too many other kid I know are not kept in tow. the just let them run around and hassel everyone and are happy just to get them off their hands for awhile. If you have kids you shouldn't expect because other family is around that you can take a break and let someone else worry about them.
Marrying My One And Only ~August 11th 2007~
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 7/8/2006 11:35:20 PM
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Just so that no one makes the same mistake that I did, do not bring this up around your FSIL who has three girls. I wasn't even thinking, and I said that we were thinking of not inviting any children, she blew up and told me, fine so now I have to get you a present AND pay for a babysitter. Then she went on about how much the girls want to see us get married, and how important it would be to them, the youngest is going to be 3 and she wont remember, the middle will be 6 and probably wont remember it in a couple of years. The only one that may remember it will be my oldest niece who will be 10 at the time. Anyhow, we have since decided to invite children, oh lucky me, I don't want them there, but it means a lot less hassle, and I'm not in the mood to get yelled at by his family, know what I mean. I love them, but it's easier to just agree to the little things like this, plus I really don't think people with kids will end up staying very long at the reception anyhow.
June 30, 2007 Is my favorite day
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