CanadianBride.com Talkboards / CanadianBride.com Talkboard / Conflicts & Etiquette / Need To Vent / Latest Posts

RE: Need To Vent

mombride — Wed, 12 Apr 2006 17:58:40 GMT

wanna trade?

i'll take your sister in my wedding party and you can have mine

just to shut her up i think i'd give her and her ds some honorary role to play at the wedding. something that won't matter if she bothers to show up or not.

your girls already bought their dresses etc (besides being just plain rude to kick a friend in the tush just because your sister suddenly decided she wants her place in the wedding lineup)

as for the shower - i think i would have told her to bite me! baby showers, bridal showers, whatever. people put them on because they care about you and want to put them on. its not about you wanting stuff. its about people who care wanting to share your happiness in a special way. you don't always have control over who puts one or or who they invite. you might even find yourself smack in the middle of a surprise shower you never knew about. i suppose that would be greedy of you too to make someone put on a surprise shower that you didn't even know about.

and typically the bridesmaids and moh are involved in organizing your shower, whether they do one on their own or plan it together with your mom and sisters.

your sister is acting like a twit.

RE: Need To Vent

JennAnn — Wed, 12 Apr 2006 11:03:05 GMT

Thanks for the encouragement everyone. I feel much better and have gotten her to do the candle lighting. We are having a child less wedding and reception and everything is fine with that. Well I am off for now.

Jenn

RE: Need To Vent

MrsMtobe — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 01:56:12 GMT

[quote][b]JennAnn (4/9/2006)[/b][hr]I will start this off in the beginning. I had asked my sisters to be in the wedding party when my FH proposed and we decided we were getting married. Well both of them said yes as did the other girls I asked. Then when everyone found out they were paying for their own dresses and hair appointment everyone but my maid of honor backed down and said no way I can't... My sister even pulled my nephew out of the wedding party as well. Ok fine so I decided to look at it differently and I got a wedding party now that rocks and is the bomb and helping me loads.

Now my sister has decided she wants back in and my nephew should be put back in. I mean she wants me to reorganize the wedding party again and kick someone off and let her step in. I said no way and that it isn't fair to make someone else who has put money, time and effort into this step down because she has changed her mind and who is to say she won't change it again. Like she had invited people to a bridal shower she was planning and cancelled it because she found out my wedding party was planning one as well. I swear I am gonna scream.... I got a nasty e-mail from her after she cancelled the shower screaming at me for being rude and inconsiterate and greedy. Can I help what other people plan and are doing..... Hello??!!

What should I do? I love my sister but I am happy with my wedding party and we have already bought the stuff for the wedding party... Do I really need the drama if she changes her mind again.... Ahhhhhhh!!! What to do

Thanks for listening.

Jenn[/quote]

what to do?? NOTHING!!!!!! Your sister was asked, accepted then declined along with her son. Now she wants back in after you were able to replace her. Oh well! Too bad for sis at this point! Do not give in. There was no reason for her to cancel the bridal shower she was planning. Personally, I think she canceled it out of spite and was screaming at you to try and manipulate you into putting her back in ... a guilt trip more or less.

RE: Need To Vent

lstreet — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 00:31:07 GMT

She chose not to be in the party, she'll just have to live with her choice. That is not fair to you for her to expect you to change your plans now, nor is it fair to those you have chosen and have been such wonderful help! She's obviously being selfish. I say stick with your plans - you don't need the stress of trying to shuffle things now. She made her bed, she gets to lie in it.

RE: Need To Vent

jjf — Sun, 09 Apr 2006 23:59:54 GMT

Toot toot!! The wedding ship has sailed and your sister missed the boat. Too little, too late! No doubt you love your sister but what kind of sister pulls out of a wedding party and sends you nasty emails....do people not know that brides are walking balls of stress????? You have done the work and so has your awesome, fabulous BMs...they really stepped up for you so to take one away now would be really mean I think...just my $0.02. Maybe give your sister and newphew another job and simply say " I am not willing to be mean and cruel to someone who has helped me out so much when no one else would." Then suggest she wash dishes at the reception as that would really help you out....okay...don't do that...just a little fun! It will be fine and you will have a fabulous day, hopefully your sister will have learned a lesson from her actions...you can't always get what you want!

JJF :w00t:

RE: Need To Vent

julesmc — Sun, 09 Apr 2006 09:32:05 GMT

Stick to your guns and don't change the wedding party...that seems like it would cause you a lot of stress. Perhaps you can give her a different job?

RE: Need To Vent

UneekBride — Sun, 09 Apr 2006 09:31:16 GMT

Ah that sucks! I would tell your sister that you snooze you lose. She had every opportunity to be in the wedding party. I would reconsider having your nephew in it. Because they are young and cute and will have a blast. But that is me. If you like you can ask your sister to do a reading or be and usher. Just let her know that there those are the only positions left and they are going fast. Put a little pressure on her about it. But don't be kicking off one of your bridesmaids who stepped up to take her spot. At least I wouldn't.

Good luck! Let us know how it goes. Family stuff can suck sometimes!

Need To Vent

JennAnn — Sun, 09 Apr 2006 08:55:22 GMT

I will start this off in the beginning. I had asked my sisters to be in the wedding party when my FH proposed and we decided we were getting married. Well both of them said yes as did the other girls I asked. Then when everyone found out they were paying for their own dresses and hair appointment everyone but my maid of honor backed down and said no way I can't... My sister even pulled my nephew out of the wedding party as well. Ok fine so I decided to look at it differently and I got a wedding party now that rocks and is the bomb and helping me loads.

Thanks for listening.

Jenn