CanadianBride.com Talkboards / CanadianBride.com Talkboard / Conflicts & Etiquette / How do you uninvite a guest? / Latest Posts

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

Pansy — Tue, 11 Apr 2006 18:09:28 GMT

I liked Stacey's response to the questioning of why he wouldn't be invited to the wedding! "After the way you acted earlier, you really think we'd enjoy your company at our formal wedding?" Pfft.

As for the situation with his friends - skip 'em. Although they were cool people, etc... they're people you seem to hardly know. Regardless if you know them or not, it sounds as though your relationship with them is somewhat removed thanks to Mr. Drunky Pants. Skip the trouble and then use the excuse if you run into 'em later - "Close friends and family were invited only."

Good luck!

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

ScotBride — Tue, 11 Apr 2006 07:19:39 GMT

Don't say you mailed it and it got lost... still says he's invited and he'll be sure to show up.

Instead, just say that you couldn't have any more people since you both have so much family attending. But, you appreciate his support and encouragement.

Hope that helps... good luck!

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

everlovin — Tue, 11 Apr 2006 05:27:28 GMT

[quote][b]UneekBride (4/11/2006)[/b][hr]Yep, I would not send an invite. If he asks why just tell him "cause there will be no animals allowed you drunken ape."

Cause I am all about being subtle.[/quote]

Another fine example of Liz's

moderating skills. ROFLMAO

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

UneekBride — Tue, 11 Apr 2006 01:29:03 GMT

Yep, I would not send an invite. If he asks why just tell him "cause there will be no animals allowed you drunken ape."

Cause I am all about being subtle.

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

MrsMtobe — Tue, 11 Apr 2006 01:25:00 GMT

[quote][b]browneyed (4/10/2006)[/b][hr]We have guest that has been asking to come to our wedding for months so we told him we would invite him. He is not family or a close friend but really wants to be there. At our stag and doe he was very loud as he had been drinking quite a bit and he was yelling during my fh speech.

I was very upset about it and thought he was rude. Many of the guests also commented on his behaviour to me and fh over the past week. I don't want him at my wedding. I have not sent him his invitation yet. Should I just not mail it and if he asks just say that I did or how do I tell him it is because of his behaviour that we won't be inviting him. I don't want him to ruin my reception.[/quote]

It's quite simple... DO NOT mail his invite. When he complains he never got it, then simply tell him that his behaviour at the stag and doe caused you to revoke the invitation as that is not the behaviour you want around you on your wedding day. End of story, now send the invitation to someone else who will act accordingly at your wedding.

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

crazykewl — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 23:15:39 GMT

I like the reason "We are only having family and very close friends"

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

jjf — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 22:58:21 GMT

Send NO invite and tell a little white lie...I like family and close friends only is what we have room for. Maybe he will figure it out and maybe not...who cares?? It is YOUR wedding and do you want to invite someone who has the potential to ruin your day? You know that you will be worrying and waiting for him to act up so why bother with the stress....save yourself now as stress will come anyway later.

JJF :w00t:

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

nikki04 — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 21:46:00 GMT

I know how you feel.. Having someone loud and obnoxious around is even hard for me to tolerate in my house let alone at my wedding!, unfortuneatly, the most loud and obnoxious person I know is one of my FH's groomsman! :crazy:

I would for sure confront him and say that you will be unable to invite him to the wedding for reasons that matter to you and your FH, even if you don't send him an invite dont you think he might show anyways? If he already thinks he's invited maybe he will think he didnt need to get an invite...? Anyways, good luck!

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

stacey8422 — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 18:02:10 GMT

Honestly I would tell him the truth. He was pretty much asking for this if he chose to act how he did at your stag and doe...if he asks, I would say that he has a lot of nerve and that it's simpily because of the behaviour he presented at the stag and doe, and that you don't want your wedding day to be a drunk fest. OR you could be nice and just say that there is only room for close friends and family.

Either way I wouldn't make something up, cause he could end up showing up anyways, and wouldn't that make your day!!?

Stacey

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

everlovin — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 17:55:15 GMT

[quote][b]deloresdoe (4/10/2006)[/b][hr]

Mr and mrs so and so

wish to uninvite you to the wedding

of their daughter so and so to so and so

saturday june five two thousand and six

4 o'clock in the afternoon

during said reception you may stay home

and watch reruns of bridezillas

monetary gift still appreciated[/quote]

ROFLMAO!!!!!!

Nice one, dumbass......

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

deloresdoe — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 17:31:36 GMT

Mr and mrs so and so

wish to uninvite you to the wedding

of their daughter so and so to so and so

saturday june five two thousand and six

4 o'clock in the afternoon

during said reception you may stay home

and watch reruns of bridezillas

monetary gift still appreciated

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

everlovin — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 16:20:30 GMT

[quote][b]browneyed (4/10/2006)[/b][hr]Thanks for all the replies girls. I won't be sending him his invitation.

I don't want to have to worry about his behaviour all night plus many of my other guests are upset with him and won't tolerate the behaviour a second time. Hopefully I won't run into him between now and the wedding.

Another dilemma is another couple that he came with are also supposed to come (they are ok) do I not send them their invite either? He came with them to the stag and doe and will wonder what's up if they get theirs and he doesn't. I have not mailed either one. [/quote]

This is a problem that will not go away on its own and it has the potential to create havoc with your planning. In your place, I would send this person a letter.

Dear so and so,

I know that you expressed an interest in attending our upcoming wedding and while we are flattered by that, the decision has been made to not include you as part of the guest list.

Yours truly,

Browneyed girl.

IMHO, meeting this problem head on instead of trying to figure out ways to dodge it is far smarter. You are not obligated to invite this person nor are you obligated to explain why you are not inviting them. If they should ask, your reply should be: "I don't have to give a reason. It's my wedding and I decide who is coming and who is not."

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

browneyed — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 15:33:00 GMT

Thanks for all the replies girls. I won't be sending him his invitation.

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

icywedding — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 13:54:20 GMT

Hmmm, that's a really tough one. I don't know what I would do in that situation.

It depends how close you are with him...... because he might get very offended/upset if you tell him that you aren't inviting him because of his behaviour at the stag and doe. I think what I would do is not send out an invitation to him at all... and then if he asks, just say that you really had to cut back on some of the guests because your list got too long. If you're not very close with him, then maybe just tell him the truth and that because of his obnoxious behaviour you've decided not to have him attend the wedding.

But really...... that is a hard one. I hope everything goes smoothly!! :)

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

dansfiance — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 12:56:17 GMT

Plus, what if he gets loud and obnoxious at the wedding.. you definately don't need that kind of crap!

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

Claudia80 — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 12:42:56 GMT

Just don't send him one period! That's it! It's your wedding, you invite who you want! Why do you have to worry about him being a jackass that night! You'll have enough thigs on your mind than to worry about what a guest is going to act like.

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

EastWest — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 12:11:23 GMT

Don't send him an invitation....if you say you did and it may have gotten lost he may show up anyways. I would definitely tell him it's a close family & friends only event as well...because if you try to explain that he behaviour is the cause...he may swear up and down he won't behave like this at the reception:)...

just my 2 cents worth...

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

AlanaBanana — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 12:05:10 GMT

Just don't send him an invitation. If he asks, tell him the truth - you've decided to keep your guest list to very close friends and family only.

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

KiKiLondon — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 10:56:43 GMT

Just say that there's not enough room.. That's what we're doing. You don't have to hurt people's feelings and you get the same result, ie not have him at your wedding!

RE: How do you uninvite a guest?

dansfiance — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 10:54:23 GMT

you could say that it was because of his behaviour, or you could lie and say that there wasn't enough room.. or there was more family to invite than you thought..

How do you uninvite a guest?

browneyed — Mon, 10 Apr 2006 10:53:05 GMT

We have guest that has been asking to come to our wedding for months so we told him we would invite him. He is not family or a close friend but really wants to be there. At our stag and doe he was very loud as he had been drinking quite a bit and he was yelling during my fh speech.