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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 5/7/2007 5:13:51 PM
Posts: 5,
Visits: 16
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| Hey guys. I wrote here a while back about how my parents refused to pay for the wedding because my fiancé and I have been living together for four years and blah blah blah. I have gotten over that. But now... that means that all the costs are on my fiancé and I. And unfortunately, we are not millionaires. I have dreamt my whole life of the nice big wedding. I already have all the little details planned out. I have my wedding party all picked and they have all accepted (a moh and 4 bridesmaids). I know the music, the theme, the dj, the decorations EVERYTHING The only thing I am cringing at is the price of the reception. I am skeptical because there is a large probability that my parents won't make it down. Along with my family that live in QC. So... I will be paying thousands of dollars for his family only. Long story short... i was wondering... is there a way that I could do the ceremony, the pictures and dance but no food without seeming greedy and selfish. Along with this thought, is it normal or ethical to ask people to get up and early to get ready for a morning ceremony and then go home or do whatever and then come back like four hours later? I initially thought of having a morning ceremony, a brunch (cheaper by like almost $5000) then having a huge party but only serve platters of snacks (that I would prepare myself at home) at night. I can't afford the dinner. And I hate the idea of booze at the wedding unless it's like champagne. I don't want to seem greedy. i really don't. I am so discouraged with all this, we might elope. And I don't want to look back a few years from now and say... I wish ... Man we should've... Any of you feel completely baffled with all this planning. I know one of you brilliant women will have alternative ideas. Thanks for letting me vent. I didn't know I was so upset. Happy Easter
- Orcarose
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 4/18/2006 4:34:00 PM
Posts: 14,
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We're university students - we have no money and our parents can't help us out. We're having a tiny wedding: a civil ceremony, photos and then a small dinner.
We are more concerned with the marriage than the wedding day.
Hopefully later on, when we have our careers on track and some savings we can have a large celebration. Maybe.
We're private people, we don't like parties, we don't like spending our hard earned money making everyone but us happy. There's nothing wrong with eloping - or semi-eloping like what we're doing. Do what you can afford to do. If you can't afford a dream wedding - you'll probably regret spending a lot of money on something you're not happy with.
Good luck!
K + J 05/23/06
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 7/16/2008 11:48:23 PM
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We are paying for absolutely everything ourselves, and I am a stay at home mom, so we don't have much money either. We have a budget of approx $4000, adn this is largely due to the fact that we are doing alot ourselve...invites, all the decorations, programs, and the meal...we got a amateur, but very talented photographer who is doing the wedding for at least half of what everyone else charges and a great deal for the DJ. If you are already thinkning now that you might regret eloping, don't do it. If you need to save the money, wait a year or 2, then have your dream day.
You can call me 'Mommy Dearest'!! Started my Happily ever After June 10 2006
Mommy to Molli & Tessa *Caution*
Contents may become heated under suggestive statements
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Group: Moderators
Last Login: Yesterday @ 10:50:30 PM
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| I think your idea of a brunch is great along with the idea of having an informal party later with food you've prepared. If you really want friends and family to share your day, there is nothing wrong with your idea at all. Now, you can still get married in a civil ceremony (wear your gown if you bought one or wear something equally special in your eyes) and throw an informal party later that night. You can still get photos taken etc... too! A 3rd option .... have a quiet civil ceremony and wait til your 1st annivesary to throw your wedding... it will give you another year to save money, and throw the kind of wedding you want. This could be where you have your marriage blessed in a church with the bridesmaids etc... and a larger scale wedding with reception and everything.... or ............. 4th option .. wait a year or 2 ... save money, and throw the wedding of your dreams. There isnt anything wrong with waiting ... 
MrsMtobe ~Live and let live ~ Mod Squad Moderator The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness.
Mrs. M and loving it!!!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 3/31/2008 8:47:11 AM
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I think if you do something small and casual it would be nicer than eloping. There is nothing wrong with small brunch after the ceremony (I love brunches) and then get together with maybe even a larger group at night. Sandwiches and dancing wouldn't cost you that much but gives you the opportunity to celebrate.
Cheers, Julia!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 7/16/2008 2:17:06 PM
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I think you should have the wedding you've dreamed of, just do it on a smaller scale. The brunch sounds great, and if it will help you cut costs, then I say go for it! Another plus is most people don't get smashed at brunch, lol so a couple of bottles of wine per table should do ya!
www.amandaandvince.com
support bacteria - it's the only culture some people have!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 6/9/2006 9:58:08 AM
Posts: 47,
Visits: 47
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| We are paying for everything ourselves too. I worried alot about the etiquette of everything too but then said if they really care about me then it won't matter how I decide to do it. So if people think I am tacky so be it. We are getting married at 3pm at the church then are having a receiving line afterwards then pictures. Our dinner is 6pm but we are only having 65 people for dinner - all immediate family, aunts, uncles, wedding party and our closests friends. We are then having a reception with dance and midnight lunch (sandwiches, cheese, veggies, pickles, fried rice, etc). Everyone (200) is welcome to the church and to the dance but a limited number to the dinner. We cannot afford everyone to the dinner and those who know us will understand this. I have been to several weddings where I have not been invited to the dinner and it did not matter I still went to the dance. Another option for you is the married in the evening 6 or 7pm with the reception and dance to follow. No dinner required. Just serve a midnight lunch at the dance. Several of my friends and cousins did this and it worked out great.
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