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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 7/5/2007 1:27:29 PM
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Im unsure what to do with this. My sister, who is in my wedding party, has told me that she might not be 'able' to be in my wedding. Her reason being that she can't afford to pay for the dress (hasn't even been picked out yet). I have told her I will pay for my nephew's tux and my niece's dress so she doesn't have to. Then she says that we should change the date of our wedding because it falls around too many other "holidays" (Dad's 50th, Easter, Her Wedding Anniversary) I told her it was her choice but inside I kind of want her to pull out... reason being is we have already gone over our budget and the wedding is a year away and having a 4th person each in the party will cost us a bunch more money. I dont want to tell her this because I DO want her to be part of it but I dont.... Is that wrong? Should I just tell her to pull out to save us BOTH money? She's not even sure if she's going to and she's not sure when she will know. So in my eyes, I can't put things on order until I know... Im just rambling sorry. But if you do have an input I would LOVE to hear it... Thanks
Jess
~~ His Mrs. for Life ~~
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Group: Moderators
Last Login: Yesterday @ 11:06:25 PM
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| I don't see how having 1 more bridesmaid and groomsman will cost you a whole bunch more money. An extra bouquet maybe? A small gift to say thanks for being part of your wedding party? I personally, don't see this as extra huge costs... but that's me... Having said that .. this is what I would do .... Approach your sister and say: I want you in the wedding, but this is a choice that you have to make yourself. If you feel that it would be best if you weren't in the wedding party, I will understand and accept your decision. But, I need for you to decide by this date!!! (supply her with the date) When the date arrives, then call her and ask for her decision and see where that leads you or she may step down right then and there. Good luck Oh, by the way... I moved this thread to Conflicts, because this is where your thread fits 
MrsMtobe ~Live and let live ~ Mod Squad Moderator The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness.
 Mrs. M and loving it!!!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 4/17/2008 7:27:36 PM
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| I agree with what MrsM said but with no disrespect intended, I would like to point out to other newbies here that this is one of those very good reasons to NOT choose your wedding party right away. Waiting until six to nine months prior to the wedding day helps you avoid such problems, especially if you are reading on these boards on a regular basis. EL
Some people are like Slinkies... Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.
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Group: Forum Members
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I agree with MrsM ... how will this cost you TONS more money? Sounds like an excuse to me ... I would do exactly what MrsM said.
 IGGY
Married May 26, 2007 Rachael arrived July 2nd!!!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 3/29/2008 1:17:47 PM
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| I can see how it would be a bit more expensive, since you have to pay for dinners, gifts, flowers, and possibly your sisters dress to? But if you really want her there then I don't think it would be a big problem. I agree with MrsM's advice...let HER make the final decision, but let her know that you will need to know what she wants. I also agree with EL....luckily I read these boards when I got engaged. We have been engaged for almost 7 months now and haven't chosen the WP. We figure we will do it 1 year before the wedding...so this June. We are ALMOST decided on who we want. Good luck with your sister!
MLD *Engaged: Sept. 23, 2005*Married:June 9, 2007* I love my HUSBAND!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 7/8/2006 11:35:20 PM
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Well unlike everyone else I can see how it can add more money for you, paying for your niece and nephew's outfit, that's a lot of money to dish out for someone who may or may not be coming to your wedding. I'd say talk to her, ask her what she would like to do, but most importantly explain that she isn't going to hurt your feelings if she can't make it.
If it makes you feel better, I chose not to invite my FSIL because she does not have enough money to buy herself a new dress, since I already picked the BM dresses and they are $200!!!!! I can't nay don't want to pay for her own dress, because I would also have to have my three nieces in there as well as junior bridesmaids and they would have the same dresses as well. It really adds up doesn't it?
June 30, 2007 Is my favorite day
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