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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 9/27/2007 8:30:23 AM
Posts: 347,
Visits: 1,715
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| okay... this is the story FH & I originally planned and hoped for a DW in Mexico. We put a deposit down (only $100USD) and signed up with a wedding planner ($50USD). I made a wedding website ($50CAD) and was putting on the finishing touches on our Save The Dates when outta the blue FMIL doesn't want us to have a DW. Okay, fine... as long as we have some financial support to have it in Ontario. They agreed. Okay off to a good start again!!! So we printed off a whole bunch of booklets of the venues we are interested in. Brought them down so FMIL could look through them and give us her opinion on which one she likes the best. She picked out the 3 choices that WE liked too. Old Mill, Waterside Inn, and The Club at Bond Head. Alright, another good start... We then proceeded to make plans to meet with the 3 venues to take a tour of the facilities without FMIL (they live 2 hours away in St. Thomas). This weekend that just passed we visited The Club at Bond Head. Amazing venue and this is our first choice. Loved the room, loved the food, loved everything about it. Yes, it is in the middle of nowhere and our guests will have to either rent a room at a nearby B&B or hotel. The F&B manager suggested The Kingbridge Centre in King City. So we were happy. My mom came along too. She adored it!!! We got home and kept saying how amazing it is. If I have my way, this is where we are going to have it. Then FMIL calls.... (da da dum) she says that her girlfriend and her checked out The Club at Bond Head and they hated it. They said its beautiful but our guests are not going to like driving all this way blah blah blah. FH started yelling at her and said that this is the first one we have seen and it will be hard for the others to compare!!!! Congrats to FH for sticking up to his mom!!! They argued for like an hour.... finally he got off the phone and he started to cry.... i hate seeing FH upset. She really wants us to have it at the Waterside Inn in Port Credit... which is number 2 on our list and I am just waiting to hear from their banquet manager to arrange a viewing. She was comparing the 2 and said that the Waterside Inn is better for the cost. You save roughly $3000. ONLY $3000!!! Then while we were watching TV later that night, she calls AGAIN! This time I am assuming she is calmer and told us that if we need money to put a deposit down they will give us the money to do so. I am so confused over this lady, she cannot make up her mind. We are keeping our mind open and we haven't set anything in stone yet. She is just way oh my goodness... FH said he is going to have to tell them that they are not the only ones chipping in money so they do not have the final say in where we have it. Also we do not want a DJ. We both hate them and think they are a HUGE waste of money for US!!! We hate the music they typically play (top 40 hits, cheesy chicken dance... etc) She disagrees and tells us that we should have one. She said that no one will dance. FH wants to make a playlist using i-tunes and have it playing the whole night. We will have an MC that will help get things moving if need be and to introduce us and everything. Plus usually venues have an audio input so we can hook up our laptop where our playlist will be. sorry for the long vent... if you can offer any help or suggestions on what to do or how you are dealing with a weird FMIL... that would be wonderful... thanks ash
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 6/18/2008 10:00:41 AM
Posts: 110,
Visits: 655
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| Yup, I got a crazy one too. Nice lady, but ever so slightly insane. Quite often contradicts herself regarding how many guests should be invited (says our list of 100 is perfect, then says "oh my god, that's way too many!", THEN gives a list of like 150 distant family members that NEED to be invited!) FH has explained that the best thing to do is to ignore her like he does! haha. Apparently she's used to her family ignoring her, poor thing. Haha. Any money my or his family is chipping in is more or less a gift for us to have the wedding that WE want. They can make suggestions all they want but utlimately it's OUR day!! If they don't like where their money's going, they don't have to give you any and you can go ahead with a DW. I think that's the choice they have to make. It's still your wedding and YOU (and FH i guess teehee) get to veto any you like, missy! that's what I think anyway.
Me and him..August 4, 2007
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 3/5/2008 3:56:44 PM
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| I feel for you ... just take it in stride and remember its your wedding. My FMIL is so-so...... she's always saying there is somuch to do then does nothing 
sonia  D+S - October 27, 2006 I'M MARRIED!!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 6/14/2007 6:53:48 AM
Posts: 519,
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I am so sorry you are going trough this *hugs*
I have to ask...Why is FMIL running the show..is she paying for the wedding????
Is she is let her be her way but if she ISN'T put your foot down and you and FH have a talk with her..and tell her that you will do the things the way you want them done...if the guests don't like the reception place then they can just decline the invitation...I am sorry but I am kind of person who wouldn't put up with this kind of crap.I hope everything works out for you and let us know how it goes with her
***************** ~ Dijana ~ Married and loving it!!!!!!!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 9/27/2007 8:30:23 AM
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no they are not paying for the entire bill... they are contributing like my parents are along with us. So they do have a say but they are not the only ones that have a say. and most likely they will not be the side that gives the most... my mom and my step-dad will prolly be contributing more then them.... sooo yea i hope its not a roller coaster event with EVERYTHING.... up and down
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 6/14/2007 6:53:48 AM
Posts: 519,
Visits: 720
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Well if you don't show her who is the boss (you and FH) then it will be like that for everything...you have to make her see right now at the begining that this is YOUR wedding and you two get the final decision in EVERYTHING.
***************** ~ Dijana ~ Married and loving it!!!!!!!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 9/27/2007 8:30:23 AM
Posts: 347,
Visits: 1,715
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FH has been very clear that this IS our wedding. Argument over argument he always says "isn't this our wedding?" "its our wedding, mom, we want it this way" and such... she just doesn't listen.... she is a very stubborn women FH has informed me. I am very happy that he is talking to his mom about this. I know some FH just do not care and let the bride have to deal with it. Thank goodness he isn't like that because if it was up to me... we would be getting married at city hall without anyone there and we'd be married now. So it is he that wants a party so he is dealing with his mom.... I told him to tell her that if she continues to be like this we WILL get married at city hall with or without them.... sooooo do not know if he will actually say that to her... i hope he does... that will shut her up. i mean we have already changed our plans to make her and her family happy sooo what else does she want from us?
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