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Hi again,
Another question from yours truly. Boy I sure am getting use out of these boards!! THANK YOU CB!! 
My Fiance and I are having a non-denominational ceremony and would like our ceremony to be special, despite it not being in a religious house of worship i.e. a church or synagogue.
We had initially wanted to have our reception and ceremony in the same location thinking we would just find a really special place to have the entire wedding, and be done with it. Not so easy, we're finding. At least not on a budget anyway.
I don't like the idea of walking down the aisle in a banquet hall. Nothing against those who do, but for me, I want it to be something that feels special to me, something to compensate for the lack of spirituality in a banquet hall. FH and I are not religious people but I am spiritual in my own way and it's just really important to me to have my ceremony in a meaningful place, even if the meaning only comes in the form of something that speaks to me visually - i.e. in a place with incredible architecture, with great history, etc., a stunning terrace garden with sculptures, etc. - you get the point.
So I looked up all these incredible locations, like Graydon Hall, Parkwood Estate in Oshawa, Liberty Grand...... all beautiful, stunning locales, that I'd LOVE to get married at - each with a stunning outdoor backdrop for my fairytale ceremony.
However - our budget doesn't stretch that far. My reception including all incremental costs has to come in at or under $16k. So, I'm left looking for the most part, at banquet halls or nightclubs.
FH and I are going to look at SHMOOZE downtown on Tuesday, and that could end up being a venue that IS within budget (seems to be based on pricing I've seen so far), and which has a rooftop patio where I could potentially have the wedding ceremony - but I'm not so sure I want to have my wedding ceremony in a nightclub - it just kind of seems like a sacrilege.... I know that sounds odd coming from someone who's not religious, but it just does. Nightclubs go under all the time, I would prefer to have my ceremony at a place of meaning, again. Shmooze has no meaning to us, it's just a cool venue for a party and it's in budget.
We have found a couple of banquet halls that are absolutely beautiful which just can't unfortunately accommodate an outdoor wedding ceremony in a location that we really liked. It's either in a terrace overlooking a parking lot and/or a drive through fast food place, or on the side of a highway, surrounded by parking lots and warehouses, construction equipment and Mack trucks.
So I've begun thinking, maybe we could do our ceremony at one of our dream locations, but our reception at a more affordable venue. For example, maybe it only costs $800 or so to do a ceremony ONLY at a beautiful place like Casa Loma (I'm not sure) - and we could do our pictures on site as well - immediately following. But then, have the reception a few hours later, after pictures are done, at a hall that IS within our budget - like the Royalton, or some other hall in the GTA.
My concern is that guests will be annoyed at having to drive to 2 different locations in one day, that aren't necessarily all that near each other (could be a 20 minute drive from one place to the other, depending). I know this is normal when you get married in a church for example, but I've never heard of someone getting married in a non-denominational ceremony at one location, and then having the reception in another place. It shouldn't matter but I'm not sure if it does.
Thoughts? Is this something that is acceptable etiquette wise or what do you think? Would it seem like we are too cheap to be able to have the reception at the same luxurious place where we had our ceremony? Should we just be settling for our ceremony in a banquet hall to appease what etiquette dictates? I'm not sure..... please share thoughts.
2 B Wed July 10, 2009!
Me (29) + FH (32) + his son (12) = 9.5 years together
Done so far:
Asked wedding party, decided on venue (Miller Lash), got catering quotes, decided theme, brainstorming details, started dress search, hired kicka$$ planner, made vendor lists, fought with FMIL, made up with FMIL, lost e-ring, found e-ring... only 10 mos to go!
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2bwed0609 (6/19/2008)
My concern is that guests will be annoyed at having to drive to 2 different locations in one day, that aren't necessarily all that near each other (could be a 20 minute drive from one place to the other, depending). I know this is normal when you get married in a church for example, but I've never heard of someone getting married in a non-denominational ceremony at one location, and then having the reception in another place. It shouldn't matter but I'm not sure if it does. Thoughts? Is this something that is acceptable etiquette wise or what do you think? Would it seem like we are too cheap to be able to have the reception at the same luxurious place where we had our ceremony? Should we just be settling for our ceremony in a banquet hall to appease what etiquette dictates? I'm not sure..... please share thoughts. Your guests shouldn't be annoyed. Most weddings I've attended have had ceremony in one location and then a recpetion somewhere else a few hours later. Think about those people who do have church weddings... I don't think anyone will think you are cheap. They probably won't think anything about it!
Sarah and Shawn 08.01.09
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Group: Forum Members
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Thx Sarah. I know, most church weddings are done that way - I just wondered if it makes sense to have such a GRAND ceremony and then a plain ol' regular reception at a banquet hall.
I wonder if I did it that way, if I'd be regretting having to leave such a stunning premise after the ceremony, to have my reception at a regular ol' banquet hall. Mind you, some banquet halls are REALLY elegant. And truth be told, I could do my photos right on premise after my ceremony if I did it that way, saving travel time for the wedding party and limo driver + photographer - and by the time all that was done I'm sure I'd be happy to just get to the hall anyhow, for some drinks and food! This idea is starting to work for me actually. Where there's a will there's a way.
I wish I could find, like, a tried and true top 10 list for all the banquet halls in the GTA. Unfortunately most of them are all paid or sponsored listings - the rankings are just paid for most of the time online. I have searched high and low. It's hard to get a feel for a banquet hall unless you've been there. But I only have so much time to see these places.
Ideally I would love to have my ceremony at say, Graydon or Casa Loma or something, and then have my reception at say, The Royalton - if only I knew I wouldn't have to share the premise with another event's guests. That really bugs me.
Any suggestions for a really modern but luxurious looking banquet hall in the GTA (ideally a place without too much traditional, ornate draping on the walls - I hate that!) where I wouldn't have to risk sharing the facilities with another event - or worse, another WEDDING? Again, my reception budget is $16k and ideally I'd like to come in under that if at all possible.
We looked at Sala Caboto at the Columbus Centre on Lawrence Ave. West the other night, and the garden terrace is BEAUTIFUL and the lobby was nice but didn't compare to The Royalton.
Pictures online don't do Sala Caboto's garden or front lobby justice though - because there have been upgrades to the premise since, with stone sculptures, fountains, (outside) etc. - it's just stunning. I was happy to have my wedding there, and the cost was right, but there were a few things I wasn't keen on even though it was so nice outside. But we'll see. At least I have my selections narrowed at this point and can work down from there.
2 B Wed July 10, 2009!
Me (29) + FH (32) + his son (12) = 9.5 years together
Done so far:
Asked wedding party, decided on venue (Miller Lash), got catering quotes, decided theme, brainstorming details, started dress search, hired kicka$$ planner, made vendor lists, fought with FMIL, made up with FMIL, lost e-ring, found e-ring... only 10 mos to go!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 2 days ago @ 9:04:23 PM
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| Okay, I have an idea for you: have your wedding at a Unitarian Universalist Church. There are a couple in Toronto, I think, and you'd get your "spritual place" for the ceremony--but the officiants would be more than happy to do a non-religious ceremony.
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Group: Forum Members
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Thanks Michelle - not sure my Jewish family would go for that. I mean, they'd be happy to go where I was happy to be married, but my family is Jewish and my FH's family is Christian - marrying in any type of church would kind of defeat the purpose of marrying on neutral ground so to speak.... thanks for the idea though!
I have considered marrying in a beautiful old church and just asking them to do a non-denominational ceremony but it just wouldn't feel right. I could also have our wedding in a non-denominational ceremony at a liberal synagogue (there are congregations that are basically the Jewish equivalent of Unitarian Christianity) but that also wouldn't quite feel right I'm sure for my FH or his family (or me probably). I do appreciate the post though, all ideas are welcome - and besides you never know who might be reading this thread later and be able to use some of these ideas!
2 B Wed July 10, 2009!
Me (29) + FH (32) + his son (12) = 9.5 years together
Done so far:
Asked wedding party, decided on venue (Miller Lash), got catering quotes, decided theme, brainstorming details, started dress search, hired kicka$$ planner, made vendor lists, fought with FMIL, made up with FMIL, lost e-ring, found e-ring... only 10 mos to go!
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Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Yesterday @ 7:53:56 PM
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Sure! I think I've always travelled between ceremony and reception at the weddings I've been to and they weren't all church ceremonies. One set of friends had their ceremony in their backyard and the reception at a hall about 20 minutes away. No problemo.
Live. Love. Laugh. 10.27.07
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