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Never give up on friendship, keep trying! |
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Unsure (state reason) |
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Loving Planning!
 
Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 2 days ago @ 10:03:56 AM
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| I don't believe there is anything wrong with taking a "break" from a friend. You seem to know that she is having issues, and she really doesn't want to make an effort right now...There is no reason you have to cut your friend out of your life totally, but maybe a time out is ok...sometimes you have to just step back for a bit, and perhaps in time you can reconnect. I am only saying this because your friend doesn't seem really into making much of an effort right now. If this is making it hard to stay connected with her, its ok to take a step back. It doesn't need to be dramatic or cutting her out, but just a break. One of my closest friends and I only speak every few weeks, and sometimes even longer. We just pick up where we left off, and its no biggie. It doesn't make you any less of a friend, to give them space and time. And it doesn't help your friendship with her to keep trying to get together and she doesn't respond...that will only build resentment. kath
AUGUST 18TH, 2007 Can't believe its over....
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Loving Planning!
Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Today @ 12:05:32 AM
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| Ladies, as always, you offer unique, diverse insights, exactly what I was hoping for when I posted this. I realize sometimes it's possible to get caught up in one's own hang-ups and ideals, which is why I resorted to polling you guys, for the fresh perspective. Some of you have given me some food for thought which I will chew on while I decide what to do, if anything. If nothing else, it's kind of reassuring to know I'm not the only one who has ever gone through such a thing. Thanks guys!!!!!!
________________________________ Mrs. Peach! Happily Married since August 19, 2006!
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Beginner Planner
Group: Forum Members
Last Login: Today @ 3:05:47 PM
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peach125 (3/26/2008)
So here's my situation, which I've alluded to in other threads. In my adult life, I've been careful not to let friendships die...well I have one friend, who, no matter what, it takes 3 emails and as many phone calls before she returns my attempts to contact her, never initates contact or get-togethers on her own, including this weekend with Easter greetings.
Hey, I'm one of those friends who is terrible at calling or sending e-mails, however, I can say that when I'm interested I'm sure to never let a friendship die. I'm quite reserved and a little lethargic but friends know, and IIIII let them know when I get to talk to them, that they can count on me.
I say, if she is really interested, you would feel it. If you feel like you are forcing it, you probably are. I say move on.
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If you don't like it. Don't look at it.
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Supreme Being Planner
Group: Forum Members
Last Login: 5/11/2008 9:29:19 AM
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| My best friend of over 10 years was supposed to be my MOH. She was on board and very happy and then all of the sudden stopped calling and I couldnt get a hold of her. Finnally got a hold of her, she appologized so much and said she still really wanted to do this. I explained that I could get a replacement if thats what she needed but I need to know now b/c its getting very close to the date... she said she was sure! My bridal shower.... cant get a hold of her she hasnt called in weeks. 3 weeks b4 my wedding I have to get a replacement (who thank GOD has about the same messurments for the dress) and still no call. My wedding comes and gos with no best friend. About 2 months later I email her and dont mention the wedding at all. She emails me back and appologizes and appologizes! Needless to say I still love her and she is still my best friend
♥♥♥Married August 26, 2006♥♥♥
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Supreme Being Planner
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Last Login: Today @ 10:00:17 PM
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| I've had to let some friendships go over the years. You know her better than any of us so only you will truly know how to handle the situation. I had a friend that I thought really wanted to be true friends, turns out she was the worse friend ever. It was *the* most empty one sided relationship I have ever had in my life so I just walked away. I did all the work and got nothing but frustration in return. I want to spend my time with people that truly love me, people that want to be there for the ups & downs (for both of us), people who are loyal and don't think that every conversation needs to be the "one up game" (competition). That was my experience with lettting a friend go, yours is probably different. I wish you good luck with your friend. I do like the idea of just coming out and asking, if you're comfortable with that.
----------------------------------------------- Can't wait for June 8th! Umakins will be coming home!
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Planning Guru
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MrsZator (3/27/2008)
My best friend of over 10 years was supposed to be my MOH. She was on board and very happy and then all of the sudden stopped calling and I couldnt get a hold of her. Finnally got a hold of her, she appologized so much and said she still really wanted to do this. I explained that I could get a replacement if thats what she needed but I need to know now b/c its getting very close to the date... she said she was sure! My bridal shower.... cant get a hold of her she hasnt called in weeks. 3 weeks b4 my wedding I have to get a replacement (who thank GOD has about the same messurments for the dress) and still no call. My wedding comes and gos with no best friend. About 2 months later I email her and dont mention the wedding at all. She emails me back and appologizes and appologizes! Needless to say I still love her and she is still my best friend Woah  You must be a really great friend to have!! Because if my MOH did that to me... I dont know if I could look at her the same way again!! I would want to scratch her eyes out lol
~~Soon to be Marie Ikonen~~ The Big Day:
August 23, 2008
http://marieandmarkus.weddingannouncer.com/
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Beginner Planner
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Last Login: Today @ 10:42:36 PM
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Friendship can be a very emotional roller coaster ride sometimes. In your situation it would come down to me just NOT contacting her for awhile and see if she contacts you. Sometimes if you know someone will get ahold of you, you just wait for it to happen, but if she's doing it because she could care less if you talk or just you haven't made it on her must call list on occasion then I would say screw it, let her get ahold of you and wonder why you haven't called her etc and see what happens. Having long time friends is fabulous etc, but if you give give give and never get, well, re-prioritize the friendship list a little. It doesn't have to be well I called you once so you should call me, it's just knowing that even though you don't talk you still think about each other. I have a best friend of over 25 years and we might not talk for a month but I know and she knows that we think about each other and when we do finally get ahold of each other (despite living about a 10 minutes walk from each other) we just pick up where we left off last time with no worries at all.
~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~ Traci & Roger - September 27, 2008 ~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~
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